Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/05/11/vonnegut-on-marriage/
Tim! I shall steal this from you, as you stole it from Kurt, verbatim! Because it is good stuff!
Ok, let’s have some fun. Let’s talk about women. Freud said he didn’t know what women wanted. I know what women want: a whole lot of people to talk to. What do they want to talk about? They want to talk about everything.
What do men want? They want a lot of pals, and they wish people wouldn’t get so mad at them.
Why are so many people getting divorced today? It’s because most of us don’t have extended families anymore. It used to be that when a man and a woman got married, the bride got a lot more people to talk to about everything. The groom got a lot more pals to tell dumb jokes to.
Most of us, if we get married nowadays, are just one more person for the other person. The groom gets one more pal, but it’s a woman. The woman gets one more person to talk to about everything, but it’s a man.
When a couple has an argument nowadays, they may think it’s about money or power or sex or how to raise the kids or whatever. What they’re really saying to each other, though without realizing it, is this: “You are not enough people!â€
A husband, a wife and some kids is not a family. It’s a terribly vulnerable survival unit.
I met a man in Nigeria one time, an Ibo who had six hundred relatives he knew quite well. His wife had just had a baby, and they were taking it to meet all its relatives. Everybody was going to hold it, cuddle it, say how pretty or how handsome it was. Wouldn’t you have loved to be that baby?
I sure wish I could wave a wand, and give every one of you an extended family, make you an Ibo or a Navaho or a Kennedy.
I hope America, over the long run, finds some way to provide all of our citizens with extended families – a large group of people they could call on for help.
Living in California has caused me to worry, in varying degrees, about the need for family connection. Although the pay wasn’t great, I really enjoyed living in Chicago the last time around, in part because I was near family and because the Office was a close-knit bunch. Two tribes! Right after the marriage I accepted the raise to move to Walnut Creek, and I did worry somewhat that leaving family and friends behind could make the marriage more difficult . . . but that we’d do alright.
Living in San Francisco, though, is much better. Plenty of social activities even for those of us between families, between jobs . . . and you don’t even have to drive to get there! (Parking is horrible, anyway.) But, yeah, next marriage, especially when we get to child-rearing time, we want to be a little more vigilant that we have got some manners of family to back us up!
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/05/06/love-actually/
Today, I was invited to add the crazy naked lady to the Flickr wheelchairs pool. So, I took another look at the photo, with an eye toward the old lady in the wheelchair, and figured I’d play with a crop to see if I could re-balance the scene a bit.
Uhm, there’s a naked lady involved . . . in case you’re at work . . . you should know that . . . (more…)
4 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/05/06/in-yer-toobs/
Adapted from a blog comment I just posted:
Regarding Mountain View burrito restaurants, if I recall correctly, La Costena annoyed me because it involved driving and too many choices, so I’ve always been a Los Charros guy. I think we had La Costena the day Tellme had its first round of layoffs. We were in mourning for a fallen comrade and we needed to get AWAY so we got burritos and ate them in the park. Since it was on the company tab, Joe ordered their very largest burrito, which was, as he described it “about the size of a baby.” It took him two days, but as I recall he says he ate every bite.
Citing the ever-awesome Maciej Ceglowski, I then offered a link to his recent write-up of the most impressive burrito-related public works project our nation has ever undertaken:
The Alameda-Weehawken Burrito Tunnel
A must-read for anyone who digs burritos, tunnels, tubes, advanced physics research, or refried beans.
3 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/03/30/ten-commandments-eating-well/
If you are interested in a healthy diet, but have grown wary of the ever-changing advice of diet fads, and you appreciate an understanding of the food offered by the contemporary American industrial food system, then I heartily recommend a serving of Michael Pollan.
If you can afford a half hour for a healthy intellectual treat, then check out his article, “Unhappy Meals”, in the New York Times Magazine. If you prefer to indulge his prose for a longer, fuller understanding of the special challenges of America’s food culture, then you should definitely check out his novel, The Omnivore’s Dilemma.
For the less patient, or for those like me who like a handy reference, I’ll share a stripped-down version of his advice on eating well, adapted from the “Unhappy Meals” article, (more…)
4 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/03/02/not-a-bomb/
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/03/01/craigslist-missed-connection/
http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sfc/mis/284107399.html
Dan Howard!! Put in a change of address!! (sunset / parkside)
hey dude, I am tired of having to take all your mail to the post office and doing the whole return to sender thing. you have not lived at this address in the 5 years that we have been here, wtf? who are you running from? we get cards from your relatives even, you could at least tell your family that you moved. we got a package for you the other day, and i am tempted to open it. what is it? i think its a vhs tape of something, is it child pornography? we even received your muni pass once. you paid for it, and had it sent here? what’s up, seriously? there are too many damn dan howards in the city for me to just start calling people, so if you are dan howard and you ever lived on –th ave, put in a change of address already.
sheesh.
In July I moved to San Francisco at xyzz –th Ave. But a few times I told people xxyz –th Ave. Well, for the past several months a neighbor on the next block has been receiving the occasional misdirected mail, and recently she got fed up and posted the above ad.
Within about two hours a friend forwarded the link to me, and I dropped off some address labels in exchange for a box of cherry cordials from my Grandma. :)
Love,
-danny
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/02/14/happy-valentines-day/
From OutKast, “Happy Valentine’s Day”:
Got a sweet little darlin back in my corner
But lo I know I love her but act like I don’t want her
Surrounded by the lovely but yet feel like a loner
Could be an organ doner the way I give up my heart but
Never know because sheeit I never tell her
Ask me how I’m feeling I holler that its irrella
I don’t get myself caught up in the Jell-o jella
And pudding pops that other sops who call falling in Love but
For the record have you ever rode a horse
Likely you could send me to Pluto I said of course
But if you aint a sweety indeedy I won’t endorse
Han Solo til I’m hit by the bullet so may the Force
Be with you and I reach you when better time permits
For now show me samples examples why you’re the shit
But how am I to know with the profession that I’m in
And if you do not know me then how could you be my friend?
Happy Valentine’s Day, and remember: when arrows don’t penetrate, Cupid grabs the pistol!
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/01/08/crotchless-french-knickers/
I guess I have been buying a lot of random stuff on Amazon.com, all the same:
Captions, anyone?
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/12/19/forget-saddam/
6.
Forget Saddam. Imagine for one moment
all the work-roughened hands
that have picked your food and sewn your clothes
and kept you alive since day one.
When we die, will there be a reckoning
of what and whom we’ve used
to pay for our lives, and how,
and will lack of imagination be allowed as an excuse?
Excerpt from Saddam Hussein is Writing Poetry in Solitary Confinement
Alison Luterman
Via “The Sun”
December 2006
Happy Holidays.
When I read the above, I was thinking “well, there is a lot that I have to give, as well.”
In that idea, the word “have” can be read as possession and as imperative.
Also “read” can function in the past-tense and the present tense.
The ambiguities of English, like the ambiguities of life, have their own beauty.
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/12/05/i-left-my-heart/
“I Left my Heart in San Francisco”
Tony Bennett
The loveliness of Paris seems somehow sadly gay
The glory that was Rome is of another day
I’ve been terribly alone and forgotten in Manhattan
I’m going home . . . to my city by the bay . . . . . .
I left my heart . . .
In San Francisco . . .
High on a hill . . .
It calls to me . . .
To be where little cable cars
Climb half way to the stars!
The morning fog . . .
May chill the air . . .
I don’t care!
My love waits there . . .
In San Francisco . . .
Above the blue . . .
And windy sea!
When I come home to you,
San Francisco
Your Golden Sun will Shine for me!
The song oozes longingly from his lips. And yet, the song itself is easy-going, like the city itself.
I am glad I grabbed this song.
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/12/03/iraq/
The problem, in a paragraph-shaped nutshell, as described by George Packer in The New Yorker:
It is true that the presence of American troops is a source of great tension and violence in Iraq, and that overwhelming numbers of Iraqis want them to leave. But it is also true that wherever American troop levels have been reduced–in Falluja and Mosul in 2004, in Tal Afar in 2005, in Baghdad in 2006–security has deteriorated. In the absence of adequate and impartial Iraqi forces, Sunni insurgents or Shiite militias have filled the power vacuum with a reign of terror. An American withdrawal could produce the same result on a vast scale. That is why so many Iraqis, after expressing their ardent desire to see the last foreign troops leave their country, quickly add, “But not until they clean up the mess they made.” And it is why a public-service announcement scrolling across the bottom of the screen during a recent broadcast on an Iraqi network said, “The Ministry of Defense requests that civilians not comply with the orders of the Army or police on nightly patrols unless they are accompanied by coalition forces working in that area.”
I know that I don’t know what the solution is. I think “bring the troops home now” is irresponsible. And nobody likes “stay the course” either, any more, which is a good thing: we need to get our collective brainpower together to find some less-bad solution to the mess. (more…)
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/11/09/impeachin-ur-d00dz/
I try not to post entries that are total crap, but every time I see this /topic on one of the IRC channels I frequent, my soul giggles:
Pelosi: I’M IN UR HOUSE / IMPEACHIN UR D00DZ
Thanks, saul! (Well, saul says he got it from boingboing.)
And, thanks, America, for providing us with this entertaining possibility.
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/10/25/yelp-2/
My take on Yelp:
When it comes to social networking, I prefer to interact with articulate people. Grammar is one benchmark. Style and panache go a long way too. Passion is another element of good writing. So, yeah, Yelpers will tend to embody some combination of erudition, style, panache, and passion, and that stuff makes me hot!
I like that Yelp is not MySpace. There’s a “cover charge” here and that is comfort with written self-expression.
-danny
Of course, this is my personal view. I am not speaking for my employer.
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/09/11/wired-911-begat-the-blog/
Curse your RSS Feeds, Gmail, for linking me to this spastic hyperbole:
When the world changed on Sept. 11, 2001, the web changed with it.
While phone networks and big news sites struggled to cope with heavy traffic, many survivors and spectators turned to online journals to share feelings, get information or detail their whereabouts. It was raw, emotional and new — and many commentators now remember it as a key moment in the birth of the blog.
“If Americans learned anything from the surprise mass-murder perpetrated on 9/11, it was that they could express their feelings honestly on the Internet.”
I try not to be a cynical, jaded, old man, but please . . . its schlocky writing like that that makes me want to invade foreign countries, just so we can bring back the draft so that instead of talking about the contribution that Muhamed Atta made to the blogosphere, a few talentless hacks might be torn from their comfort zone and have some life to share with us.
Don’t mind me, I’m just venting my spleen. After all, blogging about September 11 is “raw, emotional and new.” You’re witnessing a re-enactment of Internet History!
2 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/09/11/the-big-idea/
Stolen from gapingvoid, which has some delicious perspective on creative endeavour:
Every creative person is looking for “The Big Idea”. You know, the one that is going to catapult them out from the murky depths of obscurity and on to the highest planes of incandescent ludicity.
The one that’s all love-at-first-sight with the Zeitgeist.
The one that’s going to get them invited to all the right parties, metaphorical or otherwise.
So naturally you ask yourself, if and when you finally come up with The Big Idea, after years of toil, struggle and doubt, how do you know whether or not it is “The One”?
Answer: You don’t.
There’s no glorious swelling of existential triumph.
That’s not what happens.
All you get is this rather kvetchy voice inside you that seems to say, “This is totally stupid.This is utterly moronic. This is a complete waste of time. I’m going to do it anyway.”
And you go do it anyway.
Second-rate ideas like glorious swellings far more. Keeps them alive longer.
Mainly, I like “don’t quit your day job” . . . gives you something to do on the long commute to work. I’d take from that: have a long commute to work that leaves your arms free, if you can swing it. One thing I am completely loving about San Francisco is that I can stumble out of my house when I am good and ready, catch the next Muni that happens by, and repeat the process at the end of the day. People pay good money to drive cars, but the $45 monthly Muni pass . . . . . . at the current rate, I may part with my wheels. I spend more time driving the car around from one street cleaning zone to the next than I do actually driving anywhere!
(Still reading the darn thing. ’tis a delicious fountain of philosophy that most any of my friends should find somewhat gratifying. :)
1 Comment
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