Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2007/01/08/crotchless-french-knickers/
I guess I have been buying a lot of random stuff on Amazon.com, all the same:
Captions, anyone?
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/12/04/52-excelsior-persia-prague/
I have taken to getting some basic cardiovascular fitness in the morning by taking a brisk walk uphill to Forest Hill station. Today, as I rounded the corner to make my long hilltop descent into the subway, I caught sight of this bus, waiting:
Who needs to leave town to take a globe trot? We forget the breadth of Muni’s service area! When you get to Prague you can take the train to Lyon, where you can catch the 32 Etats-Unis!
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/11/14/ghosts-homeless/
In San Francisco
We call ghosts we pass “homeless”–
Crack-heads are lost souls
Update: Indulge your eyes with a trip into the realm of the spirits that surround us every day.
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/11/10/inbound-commute/
There’s standing in a subway car at the end, or near a door, with something to lean on.
There’s standing in the middle of a subway car, holding a rail.
There’s standing in a subway car that is so packed you don’t really need to worry about holding on. My ride home on Halloween was like this, until the costumed throngs got off at Castro.
Then there’s standing in a subway car that is so packed that you really don’t need to worry about holding on, and the air conditioning is broken.
I got off at Church Street when the subway car started to pack this way.
. . .
I left reluctantly. I left behind the guitar player who was taking up two seats, one for his case, as he quietly practiced a mellow tune, and the woman, sitting across the aisle from him, studying his fingers on the strings, and the lady with the four kids, who were told to hold on because sometimes the subway jerks, and the story was told of one kid who had been playing around and earned a cracked lip for his trouble. A middle-aged lady invited one of the children to sit on her lap.
I waited a few minutes for the next train: air conditioned, not packed, and lacking in human interest.
2 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/11/09/impeachin-ur-d00dz/
I try not to post entries that are total crap, but every time I see this /topic on one of the IRC channels I frequent, my soul giggles:
Pelosi: I’M IN UR HOUSE / IMPEACHIN UR D00DZ
Thanks, saul! (Well, saul says he got it from boingboing.)
And, thanks, America, for providing us with this entertaining possibility.
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/10/31/untitled/
Life is better in pairs.
I ache . . . but I also contain myself.
The thought of touching you
Is a joyous moment that lasts forever.
After forever I am back in myself again;
An atom alive and vibrant and a part of
This world.
4 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/10/25/underpants-gnome/
When I worked at the Pizza Place there was an endless supply of thin white cotton towels. After use they would be tossed in a hamper and swapped out with a weekly laundry service. One day I asked Jefe for a dish towel. “Deesh towels!” he mocked my queer midwestern vocabulary in his Mexican accent. To Jefe, these “dish towels” were rags.
I was just thinking about it, and back home we had a “rag bag” in the laundry closet, which was populated by torn or stained old sheets, pillowcases, shirts, and the occasional underwear.  I guess if you’re running a restaurant, you want to set a certain standard for rags. Though, I have heard that in developing countries, underwear is considered an acceptible rag for restaurant use.
Nowadays, I buy cheap little dishtowels by the dozen from the big box or hardware store. I’m too snooty for a rag bag: defunct textiles are retired to the trash. Somewhere in the midwest, the ancestors are weeping over my flamboyant lifestyle.
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/09/21/vignette/
On my way in to the office this morning, I noticed a random Muni bus trundling down Mission Street, with the destination sign reading:
GAY PRIDE PARADE
I was thinking “That’s today? But this is Thursday.” The people riding the bus looked like people riding the Mission Street bus. None of their expressions conveyed that they were headed for gay pride.
I figured this is just San Francisco, and some morning you could be on board the gay pride parade and completely not realize it.
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/08/22/public-toilets/
Some ladies started yammering on the Yelp message boards about what a joy it is to hover over a toilet seat rather than sitting on it, and I . . . I respectfully disagreed:
Jesus Christ, people.
I check out the seat, and if there’s skank on it, I take a bit of toilet paper and wipe that skank off. Â Pubes? Â A bit of splatter? Â Nothing can resist my mastery of toilet paper!
(Well, okay, some toilets are just hopeless, I lose the urge, my genitals pucker up into my body and I hold out for the next opportunity.)
Then, I place my ass DIRECTLY ON THE SEAT.
I’m proud to say, i tend to leave a potty cleaner than I found it. Â And I believe that is a way to measure a person’s character.
Personally, I think squat toilets are superior for public venues. Â Drop your drawers, poop in the hole, wipe up, wash up and go! Â Sitting is a luxury i can save for my apartment, at least until I have kids and we all start fighting over the bathroom.
I have read that with a bit of practice (in the shower) that most women can actually get a handle on the stand-and-pee thing.
I mean, in case you were wondering where I stood, er, sat, on the issue of public toilets.
4 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/08/08/waiting/
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/07/06/pen-in-the-tube/
So, we had this “swamp cooler” that had been used to augment cooling in the machine room for a time. It has been sitting unused since before I started working here a few years ago. It takes up some space, but I could never remove it because it was attached to a hose in the wall, to drain the water.
Well, this morning my colleague complained that the water was starting to smell, so I took it upon myself as the Senior Systems Administrator to solve the problem, once and for all!
We found that the tube actually ran to the sink in the kitchen next to the machine room. I pondered many ways to remove the tube without spilling water in our machine room. Tourniquet? Well, the zip-ties couldn’t compress the hose enough. In the end, I unfastened the hose from under the sink and plugged it with a pen.
From there, it was a straightforward task to pull the tube back through the wall and remove the swamp cooler, freeing us up several cubic feet of valuable machine room!
I was digging around under the sink when a coworker asked “so you’re a plumber now, huh?” I confessed that us systems guys like to think we can do hardware, but really we’re just kind of dangerous, and the right solution would have been to call the facilities people.
I started a set on Flickr to catalog such feats.
1 Comment
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/06/30/boston-creme/
| You Are a Boston Creme Donut |
 You have a tough exterior. No one wants to mess with you.
But on the inside, you’re a total pushover and completely soft.
You’re a traditionalist, and you don’t change easily.
You’re likely to eat the same doughnut every morning, and pout if it’s sold out. |
Man, I love Boston Creme donuts, and the description is horribly apt.
3 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/06/13/weekend-notes/
Friday night, volunteer at a “single professionals” party. Dig that I am the youngest person there. Some of the old ladies are looking fine, but I’m in for people-watching. Their hopes inspire.
Saturday night, first date. A woman I like, more than I should just now, but hey. We take it easy.
Sunday morning, setting up for church, sermon, farewell, lunch, strawberry shortcake.
Home to chat with a friend on the phone.
Out to San Francisco for the Haight St Fair. Crowded bus, cheek to cheek with a beautiful stranger. Disembark, greeted by an aged Chinese flowergirl, lemonade fried mushrooms and high with old friends. Dancing to raggae on a crowded sidewalk.
Floating to the mission, sangria, calamari, and salad.
Switch dates.
Potatoes, chicken, and more sangria. A walk with a pretty philipino and a furry lhaso apso.
Ride home with a doggy in my lap, crash, and wake up restless but groggy at 4am, determined to keep on.
Oh, hell yeah. It is midnight Monday now, I am completely exhausted but still a bit euphoric. I will add that “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner” is a freaking bad-ass, hard-core, balls-to-the-wall awesome movie. Watch it! Ah yes, and I squeezed in a thoroughly platonic date with a second lady this evening. We had a good time, touching only with our eyes. Works for me! Good week, everyone!
Feedback Welcome
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/02/10/klinton-voagra/
Dude.
I can’t take it any more, this spam cracks me up:
From: “Angel Leblanc”
X-Mailer: The Bat! (v3.0.1.33) CD5BF9353B3B7091
Subject: Former President Bill Klinton uses Voagra! [#14227]
Everybody knows the great sexual scandal known as “Klinton-Levinsky”.
After the relations like this Klintons popularity raised a lot!
It is a natural phenomenon, because Bill as a real man in order not to shame himself when he was with Monica regularly used Voagra.
What happened you see. His political figure became more bright and more attractive.
It is very important for a man to be respected as a man!
President Kleenton demands Voagra!!
2 Comments
Link:
https://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/01/12/beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep/
This is a test.
This is a test of the new WordPress admin interface via Sidekick 2.
The web servers in your area, in voluntary cooperation with danny, his web site, and RSS feeds have devised this test in order to distract you in case of boredom. (more…)
2 Comments
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