The Engrish Bible

Ever try to read the Bible? It can take a lot of effort. The original version was in Biblical Hebrew, and had no vowels. Later scholars “interpreted” this source material, filling in the vowels. This was in turn translated into Latin, which informs much of our English translation of the Good Book.

I was thinking, just for fun, to run the Book of Genesis through Babelfish to Japanese and back again. Just to see if the “Engrish Bible” might be at all entertaining. “I barely understood the Japanese translation in Japan,” said Yayoi. I think the English is hard to follow.

Without further ado, the Book of Genesis, as translated into Engrish. Just remember, if you think this version is messed up, the version you are used to has been translated twice, and originally had no vowels!

1 God drew up the heaven and the earth with beginning.

2 Now the earth does not form shape, can be less crowded, as for the darkness there was a surface being deep, mind of God floated in the water.

3 And as for the God which was said there is a light/write which “is allotted there because it is light”. 4 God the light/write was good, as for him looking at the thing which divided the light/write from the darkness. 5 The God which was called it is light, “day,” and darkness he called, “the night. “Becoming and there equal, there was first a day of morning.

6 And you called God, “allots the Mizuma extent which divides the water from the water which there is. ” 7 It is made in the extent and from the water on that the moisture so under the extent the God which has grown hoarse. And so it was that. 8 As for God the extent “sky which was called. “Becoming and there equal, there was a 2nd day of morning.

9 And “it tries to call God, to be able to gather the water under the sky in one place and tries to appear the land which is dried. “And so it was that. 10 The terrestrial “land which it dries,” and God he who was called the water which was gathered called, “the sea. “And God looked at that that is good. 11 And the God “land which is said that tries creates the plant: The kind bearing plant and the wood of the land which you follow the various types which it withstands the fruit where that kind has been attached. “And so it was that. 12 The land created the plant: Following to type, following to the type which it withstands the fruit where that kind has been attached the plant which reaches to kind and withstands the wood. And God looked at that that is good. 13 And there becoming equal, there was a 3rd day of morning.

14 And you called God, “there is there and in order for the light/write of the extent of the sky which divides day from the night to reach to season and to be useful as many day and the sign which acquires year sign, do to do those allot 15 and permits those the light/write of the extent of the sky which gives the light/write of a certain earth. “And so it was that. 16 In order to control day and a little the light/write in order to control the night, God did the large light/write with the light/write whose two is large. In addition as for him the star was made. 17 God put in place those of the extent of the sky in order to give the light/write of the earth 18 in order control day and the night, to divide the light/write from the darkness. And God looked at that that is good. 19 And there becoming equal, there was a 4th day of morning.

20 And you called God, “the water tries to be full, the human and the animal on the earth which crosses the extent of the sky flies, the sea urchin does the bird. ” 21 So as for God the water following to type and type, all following to the bird which it flew, and all lives and portable thing it drew up creative ones where the sea which is full is splendid. And God looked at that that is good. 22 God praised those, said, “there is a benefit, increases at number, and fills up the water of the sea, and tries to increase with the earth the bird. ” 23 And there becoming equal, there was a 5th day of morning.

24 And you called God, “the land following to their types, try to create the human and the animal: The domestic animal which moves alongside the land, following to creative ones, and wild animal type, as for each one. “And so it was that. 25 Following the Kamino raw animal, to the domestic animal, and their types, creative thing everyone who moves alongside the land made following to their types, following to their types. And God looked at that that is good.

26 Then you called God, “us to permit the fact that the person of our images, is made in our resemblances, those and the excess alongside the land. In the fish of all creative thing seas which “move and the bird of the air, on all earth on the domestic animal try to control

27 So God drew up the person of his himself image
of image of the God where he drew up him,;
The man and woman him drew up those.

28 God praised those, called to those, “be a benefit and increase of number; Fill up the earth, control. Sea of air and fish of bird and in excess with land. All humans and the animal which “move control

29 Then you called God, “I all earth and give all kind bearing plants of the surface of all wood which has the fruit where kind has been attached with that. Those are your for the food. 30 And earth of air and all creative ones and with that me breath of life. “All green plants for the food are made to give all animals of all birds which move at land everything and so was that.

31 As for that looking at very good everything where he made God. And there becoming equal, there was a 6th day of morning.

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