Movies, Testimonials

Spanglish, Sideways, Oceans 12, and Closer

I have seen four movies in the past two weekends. The modus operandi has been to pay for one full-price admission at the Walnut Creek megaplex, and then sneak in to a second movie. Each week I have seen a very good movie and a not so good movie.

Last week, I caught a special preview of “Spanglish,” starring Adam Sandler. While the megaplex messed up the first few minutes of the film, and didn’t re-start it, I can not complain, because this movie was thoroughly awesome in many ways. It wasn’t over-acted, it wasn’t so predictable, I dug the characters … I then snuck in to “Oceans 12,” which was kind of an overwarmed, incoherent, self-applauding rehash of “Oceans 11.” It was a fun waste of time, but nothing great. Totally hot chick, though. I guess that goes without saying.

This week, I saw two movies with indistinct, one-word titles which I can not keep straight from each other. The one I paid to see, “Closer,” was not so good; Two hours of self-absorbed twits fucking eachother. “Sideways,” while also two hours of self-absorbed twits fucking each other, was a far better movie, because I came to sympathise, first with the twit’s friend, who wanted the protagonist to get laid, then the twit protagonist himself, who showed development as a person as the fucking went from kind of sad to completely unbelievably and hilariously insane.

My scoring?

  1. Spanglish
  2. Sideways
  3. Oceans 12
  4. Closer

Please note that I now evaluate movies based in part on what my wife would like to see, and if I were not thinking with my ring, so to speak, I would probably rank “Sideways” first, as that has the greatest appeal to single young guys.

For those short on remembering indistinct, one-word movie titles, remember, the one with Sandra Oh, where the two guys drive off to the California wine country together, is like “The Big Lebowski,” but with golf, while the one set in London with Julia Roberts, is the sort of film that the nihilists’ from “The Big Lebowski” would write. And if you haven’t seen “The Big Lebowski,” you should catch that movie too, just remember that when you get to the megaplex, the SoCal wine twit movie is better than the London whine twit movie.

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