Joy at electing a remarkable man to the White House. But a gut-punch to those of us who feel deeply about equal rights.

Just now I received a link to Keith Olbermann, and NBC commentator, who does an excellent job of expressing my dismay over Proposition 8:

The gist: marriage is about Love. At the time Barack Obama was born his parents’ marriage was illegal in 1/3 of the United States, and in the days of slavery, marriage between black people was illegal. There is no advantage to be had in opposing gay marriage, and in this culture where we feel uncomfortable about the impermanence of relationships, and the high rate of divorce, if two people can find love, we ought to allow them to enjoy it the same as anyone else.

While there are lawsuits out to restore same-sex marriage through the courts, my personal hope is that we can put it on the ballot again, and that next time it comes before the people of California, the people will have grown in their own hearts to accept that allowing lovers to marry is what we ought to do. We gained ten points since the last ballot proposition, and Prop 8 would likely have failed were it not for balls-out misinformation fear campaign by the Mormon Church and other cultural conservatives, who viewed popular support for same-sex marriage in California as the first step in a trend that would ultimately lead to acceptance of same-sex marriage throughout the United States.

We have work ahead to ensure the rights of a minority that has been tormented for too long.

Ahhh, Ikea! Our favorite one-stop shop to kill an entire Saturday stocking up on inexpensive husgeråd. The checkout process can be exhausting, but I tend to find the post-unloading furniture assembly to be relaxing.

And while Ikea has nice products at modest prices, sometimes things don’t go perfectly, and you need some customer service. This is where you experience the dark side of Ikea: getting customer service, especially from your local Ikea store, can be a nightmare.

But, fret not, as I had done, for after my whining, Paul posted the number for Ikea US Corporate Headquarters, and I have since heard from others that calling this number indeed connects you to friendly human beings who can resolve problems for you:

(610)834-0180

If you find that this does or does not bring you satisfaction, please let me know. Cheers!

Let’s welcome every foreign student we can get our hands on. Let’s make sure that foreigners come to the Mayo Clinic here, and not the Mayo facility in Dubai or somewhere else. Let’s make sure people come to Disney World and not throw them up against the wall in Orlando simply because they have a Muslim name. Let’s also remember that this country was created by immigrants and thrives as a result of immigration, and we need a sound immigration policy.

Let’s show the world a face of openness and what a democratic system can do. That’s why I want to see Guantánamo closed. It’s so harmful to what we stand for. We literally bang ourselves in the head by having that place. What are we doing this to ourselves for? Because we’re worried about the 380 guys there? Bring them here! Give them lawyers and habeas corpus. We can deal with them. We are paying a price when the rest of the world sees an America that seems to be afraid and is not the America they remember.

Amen! Let’s stop hiding behind an Iron Curtain of Fear.

Are there any terrorists in the world who can change the American way of life or our political system? No. Can they knock down a building? Yes. Can they kill somebody? Yes. But can they change us? No. Only we can change ourselves.

(Thanks, Craig Newmark.)

I didn’t use the feature because, well, it was buried under a widget and because I’m pretty good with typing keywords into search engines. I’m guessing they think “suggested keywords” might do something for newbies, though it really isn’t clear.

They just solicited some feedback. I filled out the form, and at the end they asked “is there anything at all that you would like us to know about Yahoo!, The Yahoo! Search Insiders Program or Yahoo! Search Assist?” I thought a moment, then:

What are you trying to accomplish? Build a slightly better search engine? Google works awfully damn well 90% of the time, so the bar to get anyone to switch for “better” is extremely high. Maybe you can put your massive resources behind a more ambitious idea like combining social bookmarking with Netflix/Amazon-style “recommendations” and thereby build a more personalized “Page Rank” index using social networking . . . the sort of thing Google SUCKS at.

I sound like a big dork.

Not long ago I joined a professional mailing list, and today I thought I would chime in on the topic of mobile phone reimbursement. I received a polite note from the list moderator: my message had bounced, could I please re-sends the message as plain text only. These days I am using Gmail, which sends messages in the ubiquitous multipart/alternative format, which leads with text that is followed by a potentially-prettier HTML “alternative”.

I dug around in the preferences to see where I could set “text only” but couldn’t find anything, and took that as a sign that in 2007, even Google doesn’t care about supporting this antiquated preference. I have since noticed that you can just click “plain text” right in the tool bar while you are sending a message. But . . . well, I felt inclined to engage in the time-honored tradition of obnoxious computer experts and impose upon the guy my social-technological criticism of the status quo in the form of a well-crafted flame:

I apologize for triggering an unintended exception within your system by my brazen flaunting of the antediluvian cultural mores of the group. I was unaware that there are yet a substantial number of Unix Systems Administrators in the industry who, after more than a decade, have yet to implement a sufficient combination of rudimentary technological support and cultural acceptance of the otherwise ubiquitous technology proposed in RFC 2045.

To my knowledge, my e-mail client (GMail) does not support the transmission of text-only messages, but imposes upon my orthography the ugly stain of multipart/alternative. This is likely due to the software vendor’s avaricious loyalty to the HTML document format, tempered only by a procrustean adherence to the principle of “graceful degradation”.

As my modest submission to the list does not strike me as sufficiently meritorious to bother pasting into the Unix “mail” command, I will content myself to unobtrusively study the rarefied wisdom of the more enlightened members of the group until such a time as I feel that I may possess rhetoric of sufficient gravitas to merit an imposition upon the cognoscenti. Thank you for taking the time to provide me with your polite advice on this solemn matter.

I have no illusion that my missive will cause a change in the list policy–frankly, I don’t care. The truth is, that being hampered by (an arbitrarily dumb) policy triggered my obnoxious indignation. At least I chose to express my angst in an artful manner. (At this point in my career, G3T 1T R1T3 0R D13!! just doesn’t pass muster.) The fact that I failed to see that my software was hiding the requisite option “in plain sight” only serves to make me look like more of an ass. I suppose that makes this a somewhat more entertaining story.

I guess I have had sufficient time off, now. :)

. . . once we looked at the spec for JPG 2.0, we realized that, if we built that tool, we could make a magazine on any topic. The opportunity we had before us was really “Magazine Publishing 2.0.”

. . .

Paul and I talked about all the different magazines we’d start, but ultimately decided to begin with JPG. The brand had two years of momentum behind it and a strong community. 8020 bought JPG from Heather and I for a modest sum.

. . .

We are no longer working for JPG Magazine or 8020 Publishing.

Why? The reasons are complicated, and the purpose of this post is not to air dirty laundry - it’s just to let the community know why the founders of JPG are no longer there. We owe you that much.

In one evening, Paul removed issues 1-6 from the JPG website, removed Heather from the About page, and deleted the “Letter from the Editors” that had lived on the site since day one. Paul informed me that we were inventing a new story about how JPG came to be that was all about 8020. He told me not to speak of that walk in Buena Vista, my wife, or anything that came before 8020.

Here’s where the whole “not lying” thing comes in. I just could not agree to this new story. It didn’t, and still doesn’t, make any business sense to me. Good publishing companies embrace their founding editors and community, not erase them. Besides, we’d published six issues with participation from thousands of people. There’s no good reason to be anything but proud of that.

We had a long meeting with Ron. I tried to compromise. I suggested we add text to the website, explaining the difference between issues 1-6 and the new issues. I wanted to embrace the truth: Tell people how we started, how we grew, and what we were now. It’s the story of how a successful, organic community begins. It’s the story of how authentic media gets made. And it has the added benefit of being true. Compromise could not be reached.

It became clear that we could not continue to work together with this fundamental disagreement. And because he was the CEO, I was the one who would have to leave. I still own a percentage of the company, so I hope to see JPG continue to grow and prosper. Unfortunately, it will be without its founding editors.

Note: Typos corrected and the emphasis is mine.

So . . . having recently subscribed to JPG Magazine, and having my own account, I had to consider . . . what do I do?

“Never attribute to malice what can be ascribed to [something else].” Or, perhaps, “measure twice, cut once.” I figured I’d take a stab at “fact checking” . . .

So, I took a look at JPG’s About Page to see the newly-revised history. Okay, no mention of “Publishing 2.0″ or a walk in Buena Vista Park. Let us see what truth is being buried. I pulled up the old About Page from archive.org. Interestingly, no mention of Publishing 2.0 or a walk in Buena Vista Park either. A passionately proud ramble about the hard-working efforts of a fascinating husband and wife team who through pluck and hard work and determination brought a community together and started a visionary new collaborative magazine.

From what I can tell, the effort to re-write history amounts to a site re-design which moves from trumpeting the achievements of one married couple, to acknowledge the contributions of a larger team of staff.

And what of removing the first six issues from the site? True, the current Issues page lists only the past four issues. But, if you select a contemporary issue, then change the number in the URL, you’ll find that the first six issues are still on the web site. Removed? No . . . but not linked. If you look at the Issue 6 page, there’s a link to buy the issue from the previous publishing platform, lulu.com. Subsequent issues have a subscribe link instead. Why? I don’t know, but “lies about the true history” of the magazine does not feel like the most intuitive answer. In fact, if you scroll the 8020 Blog you’ll see Derek’s explanation of 8020’s origins.

So . . . . . . I don’t know what the story is. Maybe Paul Clautier is a greedy dick. Maybe he is a well-intentioned businessman who had difficult “creative differences” with the founding team. What I can see is that Derek Powazek feels very passionately about his pursuits, and feels that 8020 and JPG should “embrace their founding editors” but the way they agreed to set things up . . . . well, it sounds like Derek now has a great deal of flexibility to pursue his next ambition.

I fail to see any lying. Although I live in San Francisco, I fail to see why I should feel oppressed by The Man. I don’t see any point to deleting my account, beyond the fact that I don’t use it, much.

But if they don’t send me my damn “Ultra-pod” already, I may begin to feel differently.

Scott’s Signature Series
Korean Style Barbecue Sauce

INGREDIENTS: High Fructose Corn Syrup, Purified Water, Soy Sauce (Water, Soy Protein, Salt) . . .

I like how every ingredient is Capitalized, that the principle ingredient is government-subsidized High Fructose Corn Syrup, and that it features both Purified Water and plain old non-purified Water.

I wrote a letter to Yahoo! today. I am curious what answer I will get:

Hello,

I live in the Bay Area. I have friends who work At Yahoo, Google, and Microsoft. I am a big Google fan, but I am also all about Flickr!. I purchased an account even before Yahoo! bought them and have since written a Flickr plugin. I have followed the recent controversey over google.cn’s launch, and I have come to the conclusion that Google is doing the right thing:

• They will openly censor searches in accordance with Chinese law.
• They will not offer services that would put them in a position to compromise privacy: mail, blogs.

I have heard press reports that Yahoo! and MSN have cooperated with the Chinese government to reveal the identity of Chinese Bloggers, and have them arrested. This is wrong. And as a user, as someone who pays Yahoo! … I want to know, what are you guys doing about free speech in China? Wouldn’t you agree that disengagement in business activity that leaves you involved in arresting people is the way to go? What is Yahoo! going to do?

Do I need to stop using Flickr if I want to feel good about using the Internet? Do I need to encourage others to boycott Yahoo!, as consumers once boycotted companies engaged in human rights violations in South Africa?

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
-danny

Perhaps, you too, should contact Yahoo!, or perhaps Microsoft, to express your concerns. I will post any reply I receive here.

-danny

Hello,

I don’t have cable, and my only access to TV shows has been via Netflix and Internet downloads.

I am very excited that you folks are now offering paid downloads of Battlestar Galactica! Bittorrent works great, but I’d like to see you guys compensated for the creative work and production costs, right? And since I only watch a few shows per month, the $2/episode is definitely a better value than buying Cable access, which is overpriced for my needs.

UNFORTUNATELY, the iTunes store is a closed, proprietary system, that can not be accessed from my home entertainment center, which runs on FreeBSD. So, even though I own a video iPod … I can not easily obtain the downloads from your vendor … and if I do somehow get to the iTunes store, I have no idea if they’re DRM-protected, which would block me from watching your show on my entertainment center anyway. :(

Please … please try to either:

a) Convince Apple to open up iTunes access to third parties. A while back, the open source community reverse-engineered the iTunes protocols so that Linux users could access this resource, but Apple locked these consumers out again.

b) Consider adopting Google Video as a sales channel — they have the capability to sell videos via traditional web browsers, which would allow ALL computer users to access your content, increasing consumer accessibility and sales for Battlestar Galactica.

Failing that … can I Paypal you guys $2/week for the episodes I have been obtaining via Bittorrent? :)

Thanks,
-danny

Case in point: Google Video. At first, I saw no utility in this disorganized beast that only supplied video within the confines of a web browser. Ah, but the times they have been a changin’! Now you can buy videos from Google video, and unless the content provider has DRM, you can download the Google video in a file, and watch it without a stinking web browser. It is my fervent hope that before long, I’ll be able to download the shows I like to watch for about $2/hour, and I won’t have to deal with the gorge-your-brain-on-crap-all-you-can-eat buffet of mediocrity that is Cable.

Well, we’ll see if things go that way. But I think the TV industry is ready to learn from the opportunities missed by the music industry. And I think that while Apple Video store has an early lead in this territory, the Google Video store shows more promise, as it is in the business of making video available to the widest audience possible, where Apple is in their 1980s business of giving people an incentive to buy their proprietary hardware.

But what really gets me excited is Google Updater. What’s this? Well, they aren’t touting Updater, they’re touting Google Pack, which is a software bundle that Google thinks you should download. The pack is mediocre–Norton Antivirus? Norton is the suck! The Pack software litters up your desktop with icons . . . grr! And since Google is making your decisions for you, Google decides that you need Firefox with Google Toolbar. Okay . . .

So, Pack is mediocre, but Google Updater . . . now this is what excites me! It is a tool to update new versions of software. Nothing so magical about that–we have been automating software update deployment in the Unix world for years now! The cool thing is that Google is releasing a tool to do this on Windows. I hope they’ll release an API, as this would be very useful for IT folks. I think this will ultimately come to pass . . . much as Google Video ultimately let you download and buy video.

But why I really want Google Updater to be unleashed as a generally useful tool, is because this sort of framework for tracking and updating installed software really ought to be a part of the OS–it is in Unix land–but Microsoft has . . . well, let us say that they have not chosen to innovate in this direction . . . and Microsoft is ever so jealous of Google, with Ballmer throwing chairs around. If Google gets into the business of improving Microsoft’s core product, man, that’s gotta scare a few in Redmond.

And nothing proves that you’re doing no evil more than sticking it to the man.

Don’t get me wrong, I mean, I love shopping at IKEA . . . the drive to the mega-store, the search for parking, the endless meandering through furniture and accoutrements, only to find yourself facing the stark reality of a giant warehouse, asking yourself if the Black-Brown BILLY bookshelf, which looks so black in the warehouse, is really the same color you were looking at in the showroom, and standing in line, wondering just what kind of crap they put in a 50c hot dog. But once you pay, and you’re rolling out the door, you know you’re not far from the actual joy of wrangling your heavy flat-packed furniture up the stairs and getting busy with the allen wrench.

But yesterday . . . well, I have officially given up on the Emeryville, CA IKEA. Here is my tale, as told in the call-and-response format that passes for “customer service” via the “Internet” these days:

From: Danny Howard
To: IKEA USA
Date: Jan 8, 4:43PM
Via: Web Site Feedback Thingus

Hello,

My wife and I have enjoyed shopping at IKEA for some years. We are accustomed to long lines, and the need for patience. But today, your Emeryville store took the cake.

We can forgive that the flat carts were not supplied, the line was unmanned, I had to go to the loading area to fetch one. Okay. Too bad none of the staff seemed interested in mediating this problem.

But what left us livid, was that after we checked out, we wheeled our carts over to an open parking spot in the loading area, and I went to fetch the car, and drove all the way around the store, and got to the loading area, only to find that someone, over my wife’s objections, had taken our spot. They were not loading … they continued to occupy our spot as I was circulated out of the loading zone.

Now … I figured “no big deal, I’ll just come around again” but upon exiting the loading zone, there is no option to reenter the store parking lot. The street leads to the highway. That is very upsetting.

So, some time later, I managed to drive back to Ikea, drive all the way around the parking lot, all the way around the store, and get back to the 5-minute parking of the loading zone. The car that had taken our spot was still sitting there, several minutes later, and the rest of the loading lot was filled with PARKED CARS–unattended–just sitting there. NOT LOADING.

While waiting for me to make my way around, my wife asked staff why they were allowing the loading zone to be filled with parked cars. They replied that they had no authority of enforcement. She asked to speak with a manager. Nobody ever came to hear her concerns.

Fortunately, on my second try, the second-to-last spot in the loading zone was available. Had it not, I would have had to park in the FIRE LANE, in order to load our purchases.

We have never been fond of the Emeryville store. The store in Shaumberg, IL is much nicer, and we may visit East Palo Alto some day. But this I can say with some certainty: I will not return to the Emeryville store, unless I can be asured that the loading zone can be made available to people who need to load their purchases, and not to _ssholes that feel entitled to make their own rules, in the absense of management on Ikea’s part.

Thank you for listening.

Sincerely,
-danny

A fire drill at Dallas IKEA? (Thanks, shesbitter)

IKEA responds:

Date: Sun, 8 Jan 2006 19:36:26 -0500 (EST)
From: customer_care@ushelp.ikea.com
To: dannyman@toldme.com
Subject: Re: Contact Us

Hello <dannyman@toldme.com>,

In order to provide you with the quickest response to your inquiry, this is an automated response. If this information does not provide a response to your inquiry, please reply to this e-mail so we can better respond to your request.

Thank you for taking the time to contact us.

If you change your mind after making a purchase, just bring the product back to your IKEA store unused within 45 days. All we ask is that you bring your receipt and the original packaging.

This return policy does not apply to cut fabrics, bedding (mattresses, mattress pads, comforters, quilts, and pillows) as well as products from AS-IS and items damaged after leaving the store. A fee of 30% of the purchase price will be charged for cancellations of custom upholstery.

You can be the first to hear about special offers, the latest web exclusives and more by subscribing to IKEA’s email list:

http://info.ikea-usa.com/IkeaOptin/Registration.aspx

We hope this information has been helpful.

Best Regards,
IKEA Customer Care Center

Which, according to my careful, cynical, jaded reading, translates as “we don’t actually want to read e-mail, so this automated system will pretend that you are asking some basic question that is easy to answer. LALALALALALALALALA_THANKS_FOR_CONTACTING_IKEA_GOODBYE_NOW_LALALALALALALALA!!!!!!!!!!

Perhaps . . . perhaps I will be proven wrong . . . and perhaps . . . perhaps the Emeryville store does have a way to keep the loading zone ready for loading . . . but . . . I have, let us say, lowered expectations.

Anyway, I got a nice dresser, and tonight maybe I’ll drag the bookshelf upstairs. But for now, I have a Monday to attend to.

]]> http://dannyman.toldme.com/2006/01/09/ikea-emeryville-bah/feed/ http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/sony-is-fony/ http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/sony-is-fony/#comments Mon, 05 Dec 2005 18:04:26 +0000 dannyman http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/sony-is-fony/

PSP? TOY! (Thanks otherthings!)

In Sony’s defense, they are renting the walls that they are defacing:

Coming on the heels of widely publicized news that Sony music CDs infected customers’ computers with security-hole-inducing spyware, Sony has hired graffiti artists in major urban areas to spray-paint buildings with simple, totemic images of kids playing with the [PSP].

dannyman says:

Corporations who think they have Street Cred are kind of lame an awkward, like White People who think they can Rap. I’ll grant you, there may be a Corporate analog to Eminem, but it aint Sony.

]]> http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/sony-is-fony/feed/ http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/gilmore-v-gonzales/ http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/gilmore-v-gonzales/#comments Mon, 05 Dec 2005 01:58:24 +0000 dannyman http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/gilmore-v-gonzales/ If you are free to visit San Francisco on Thursday December 8, then this may be an interesting activity. Even if you can’t go to this thing, you may be interested in your freedom anyway:

On the 4th of July 2002, John Gilmore, American citizen, decided to take a trip from one part of the United States of America to another. He went to Oakland International Airport — ticket in hand — and was told he had to produce his ID if he wanted to travel. He asked to see the law demanding he show his ‘papers’ and was told after a time that the law was secret and no, he wouldn’t be allowed to read it.

He hasn’t flown in his own country since.

On December 8th 2005, oral arguments in Gilmore v. Gonzales will be heard before the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals. At stake is nothing less than the right of Americans to travel anonymously in their own country — and the exposure of ’secret law’ for what it is: an abomination.

You may think he’s crazy, but it is good when people challenge the government–read more at http://papersplease.org/gilmore/facts.html.

Thanks, Jeff!

]]> http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/gilmore-v-gonzales/feed/ http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/early-retirement/ http://dannyman.toldme.com/2005/12/05/early-retirement/#comments Mon, 05 Dec 2005 00:21:53 +0000 dannyman http://dannyman.toldme.com/?p=1039 I think my mom once said that she tried to send money to one charity a week. I thought “hey, that’s a neat idea.” So, I tend to cut checks . . .

. . . but, honestly, I’m sick and tired of the massive volumes of direct mail I receive as a consequence of my good intentions. My favorite are the environmental charities that send me mailing labels . . . I have like 6zillion mailing labels already, right? So, let’s kill s’more trees.

Well, here’s the final straw:

Dear Mr. Danny Howard,

Our records show that you haven’t yet registered for the benefits of AARP membership, even though you are fully eligible.

My goodness! I’m turning thirty next month, sure, and I’d like to retire early, but this is ridiculous! I vaguely recall that charities like to target old people, because there are a lot of old folks with money they aren’t spending, some of them dabbling in dementia, who will accept an envelope, write a check for $10 or $20, and mail it back. Much as people who eat McDonald’s three times a week are seen as commercially valuable “heavy users,” these well-meaning naive old people are understood to be an important source of charitable contributions. And this AARP stuff makes me think I have been profiled by the Charitable Industrial Complex as a “well meaning naive old person.”

But I’m really more of an asshole:

I take that business-reply envelope, and send it right back. They want to pay for my name? They want to send me spam? Well, they can pay to take it back. I ripped up an offer from the nature conservancy, and mailed that back, coated in return-address labels that I just don’t need, because I have several hundred from charities, including two or three sets from the nature conservancy, already. Jeezits! No more charity!

Well, with some exceptions . . . The Sierra Club, Habitat for Humanity, and . . . my current favorite, the Miramonte High School ABE (A Better Education) club. What’s that? It is a club at the local high school that has a connection with the Moi High School, which educates students in the Kasigau region of Kenya. I cut them a check for $300, and every last penny of that goes to cover tuition, room, and board, for a young person who has more potential than money. It feels good. It feels really good, just to think about that.

And the best part? No return address labels. I might receive a thank you letter from Kenya, which will be very cool. (I have a “please sponsor me” letter that he wrote in July.) But . . . no spam . . . no flocks of letters clogging my mailbox and recycling . . . just, some young guy has hopefully a better chance at doing something good with his life.

:)

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